PRECIOUS CHILD

"Who Is This Stranger"

Who is this stranger I frequently see
An older lady who I am told is me

I remember her with dark short hair
And dark eyes that sparkled anywhere

Where is the lady I used to know
I guess she left a long time ago

Who is this stranger that I saw

She's a larger lady than I recall

This younger woman I'll never again see

So the older stranger must surely be me
But why don't I recognize the person I see

With her gray hair and sad teary eyes
Perhaps someone she loves has died

A stranger that often hangs her head
Oh no, I do recall what must be said

Her daughter died, she truly knows
But that tragedy happened so long ago

I am sure it must be almost five years
Yet this stranger still cries her tears

So unfamiliar, this stranger to me
Since her child died, she can't see

This older stranger must certainly be me
Who is this stranger I would rather not be


11/11/08
 
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"ME"


Who am I since that fateful evening of April 13, 2004?

The "ME" who ran screaming to your folding bathroom door.

 

The "ME," shouting your name, but pulling out instead of pushing in,

my heart beating out of my chest, listening to the running water within.

 

The "Me," within only seconds, punching and pushing in the door,

only to see the tragic bathtub scene, I could take no more.

 

The "ME," who became someone else who did everything right,

but haunting memories of you, always I will have of that tragic night.

 

The "ME" refusing to accept you were gone.

I can't even remember how long this denial went on.

 

The "ME" who thought you would always be in my life,

 accepting now the painful truth that cuts like a knife.

 

The "ME" now searching for my new identity,

But how can I possibly, without you, find the new "ME?"

 

The mother of Kanda, I will always be

The same "ME" who would not face reality.

 

Lost to the world I have been,

The "ME" who still remembers when.

 

My future fears have now faded away.

The "ME" now accepts that you no longer could stay

 

My new life depends only on "ME."

If only I could figure out who the new "ME" will be.

 

August 2008

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